Wednesday, May 28, 2008


But I don't wanna!

This morning I woke with one of those feelings that I just could not shake. A feeling of dread, but I could not put my finger on why I was feeling this way. A weird feelig in my stomach that prevented me from enjoying anything that passed my lips. So I worked. Dealing with government-y stuff. Meetings, paper work, paper work and more paper work. Then my admin assistant passed by my office with my pay stub in my hand. I study this form every two weeks, try to come to terms with the amount that is deducted (and no, $30 bilingual bonus money does not make up for my losses!). I then tucked the little stub away and continued with my piles of work. Then, the good fairy of administration came by again, with a bigger envelope for me to open. My pension and benefits plan. When I opened it I knew immediately where my feeling of dread came from this morning. My brain must have had some psychic connection to the information help in this package, and my brain knew to shelter me from this information for as long as possible. This little package, so tidy and correct, informed me that I can retire in 2029. I think in my own little world, I thought maybe I had a few more years at this gig before Jo and I could run off into the sunset together, a little more wrinkl-y, a little rounder, but at least still able to run. But now I am a little worried that we will instead we will be as wrinkled as sharpei puppies, slowly, cautiously, walking at a snail's pace to our beds, just as the sun is setting.

Sigh.

Wednesday, May 21, 2008


IF EDIE CRIES IN THE FOREST, DOES ANYONE HEAR HER?

I love my Edie something fierce but the little one is on a crying jag right now that is about to send me around the bend. Edie has two speeds – very very happy (we are talking bouncing instead of walking) and very very upset. The way her face crumbles when she is about to cry is like a watching a face melt during a bad acid trip….not that I….well, whatevs. Even early this morning I heard my name being blubbered from her room, and there she was, fast asleep, but her adorable little mouth looking like an upside down U. And nothing can turn her mood. No amount of tickling, joking, making lamb-ey talk (usually a shoe-in for some giggles). Nope, this little cherub decides when she is done. And when she is done, she announces it. Literally. “All done crying!” she’ll state triumphantly and she starts hopping around the house again as happy as can be, oblivious to my raw nerves.

SKIPPING
I bought a skipping rope for Grace at the dollar store. Best investment ever. She shames me with her level of physical fitness. I can almost hear her chanting “float like a butterfly sting like a bee” as she skips out the door down the driveway, around the neighbors driveways and back again. When her shirt lifts a little I see her tiny six pack flexing away, and she is developing shoulders like a football player. And she just started last week.

AWESOME-NESS
I got a phone yesterday morning at 5:30 from a co-worker telling me not to come into work as there had been a flood and the building was closed. Are you kidding me? An extra day tacked on to the long weekend? I should have bought a lottery ticket.

MORE AWSOME-NESS

Two sets of grandparents. Two kids. Two sets of grandparents willing to take said kids for the weekend. Free condo at Tremblant. Two couples who are great friends who can also get away for the weekend. Is karma finally rewarding me for all the good I bring into this world?

**If anyone has been Tremblant, pls send suggestions for restaurants, activities, etc.

Thursday, May 08, 2008


Looks aren't everything....

Have you noticed how pretty my blog is lately? Inspiring, isn’t it. When I blog, I literally compose my witticisms in Word, and ctrl-C and ctrl-V into Blogger. Occasionally I’ll get all fancy and download a picture, scribble on it, probably more for my shits and giggles than for anyone else (though if you do laugh, that makes me really happy). And SOMETIMES I get really excited and share/impose my musical taste on people and post a YouTube video. Anyhooo, I thought I’d try and do something fancy with The Blog. Actually, all I really wanted to do was install one of them there fancy blogrolls, y’know, give props to the folks I read. Well, I don’t know what I have done, I guess I panicked a bit and started cutting and pasting things I had no business cutting and pasting and now my poor little blog looks like a victim of the IceTruck Killer (shout out to Dexter fans).
So, I’m not sure what to do. Do I abandon the project altogether and go back to typing, photocopying and mailing an annual Xmas letter to fill people in on my activities? Start a whole new blog? Continue with this ugly-ass one?

Please don’t suggest I use the Blogger Help feature, instruction manuals and I broke up a looonnnngggg time ago.

Tuesday, May 06, 2008



Today is my first coffee-free day since I came out the womb some 35 years ago. Okay, well, maybe I’m exaggerating just a little bit, but I have been faithful to Juan Valdez for at least two decades now, with brief, caffeine-free dalliances when I was pregnant with both children. But, Juan always lured me back with his seductive aroma and mood-enhancing abilities. But, as of late, the affair has grown stale. I have to give Juan credit though - he has tried to spice things up in our relationship by adding whipped cream, syrups of a variety of flavours….the cheeky little monkey was even bold enough to add ice to our encounters. He even has a little coffee-porn feature at the Tim Horton’s drive-thru, where you can watch a steamy scene between a coffee and a donut. But all this has been leaving me empty inside lately. In fact, our long affair is leaving me feeling ill and shaky.
I’m sorry Juan, but I’m switching teams. Green Tea has made me promises that you can’t – Green Tea quenches my thirst, unlike you, who leaves me dehydrated and with a fuzzy tongue. Green Tea is promising me a sped up metabolism, while you, Juan, you just leave my guts rotten and churning. And I’m not embarrassed to talk to someone after indulging in a steamy cup of Green Tea, whereas after consuming you, Juan, I try to cover up what I have done with mints and gum.

I am breaking free of you Juan, free after all these years.

Come Green Tea, let us be free, just you and me.

(ooooooh, I see Green Tea can be naughty too!)

Sunday, May 04, 2008




Advice to Mom's the second time around....

Don't silence the first born when the second is sleeping. I hated being such a shush-er of my spirited/loud/rambunctious little three year old. I felt like the minute Edie was asleep I followed Grace around the house shush-ing her every move. Not cool. Since then I've witnessed other families pretty much conduct marching bands down the hallway when a baby is sleeping - and the baby continues to sleep even with all that racket!

Our house is much noisier now....

Some mom's in the blogging world are about to have their second...click on the button below and dish out your own words of wisdom.