Nobody told me there’d be days like these….
Last night I was tired. Jo went out to play hockey and I looked forward to getting the girls to bed and enjoying a little couch time. Grace complained a little that her tummy was aching – I chalked it up to her delaying bedtime. I rubbed her tummy until she was asleep (8:30). I then busied myself with making everyone’s lunches for the next day and tidying up the kitchen. (9:00). I longingly looked at the couch, but also thought of the laundry piling up. I threw in a quick wash and grabbed the items from the dryer, items now permanently wrinkled from sitting there for days. (9:30). Again, I gazed wistfully at the couch, but as I walked towards it, I impaled my foot on a piece of princess lego. With a quick scan, I realized there were toys everywhere, so I did a quick tidy up. (10:00) Finally couch, you are mine, I thought to myself. I poured myself a glass of wine, doled out some Doritos Cool Ranch chips in a bowl (well, I wish I was that civilized – I actually grabbed the whole bag) and plunked myself on the couch and readied myself for a PVR’d episode of Trailer Park Boys. That’s when the retching began. From Grace’s room came the most god awful, “exorcize this demon from my body “ sound. It was my darling girl throwing up everything she has eaten in her entire life. Now, for you seasoned parents, you may think this is no big deal, for me, it was freak out time. For Grace, it was freak out time. You see, in all of Grace’s almost 5 years, she has never, not once, thrown up. She was terrified about what was going on with her body (and I don’t blame her, it didn’t look or smell pretty!) She must have puked on every single item on her bed - this includes a family of stuffed animals, each equally important roles. This includes my bean bag that I heat up in the microwave for my achey muscles (grrrr). This includes her sheets, her duvet, her pillow, her mattress, her pyjamas, her hair, her slippers, the clothes I laid out for her to wear today and a library book. My god, have you ever been so overwhelmed you just don’t know where to begin? In the end, every thing was okay and Grace got over the trauma. Our family now has an “official” barf bowl (did your family have one of these when you were growing up?) and Grace is sort of proud of being in the Barf Club. I could hear her telling her friends about it at school this morning.

All I can say is thank God for Febreeze. Would it be wrong to snort it? I can’t seem to get the smell out of my nose.