LAMB-EY!

So last night I was flying solo with the girls as Jonas was out for the evening. After baths and showers and logging in some couch time watching WonderPets (I freaking love this show!) it was bedtime. Off we marched. I run pretty tight ship at bedtime and in general, it works quite well. While one is on the toilet, the other has her teeth brushed and then SWITCH! After bathroom duties are done, the girls hope on the “train” (a blanket that gets dragged on the floor) and they are deposited into their bedrooms. Last night had one little glitch. My stomach dropped a little when Edie said “Where’s my Lambey?” Lambey is always in her bed, waiting to welcome her to a good night’s sleep. Only, Lambey wasn’t there. Lambey has been with Edie since the day she was born, and no sleep action has ever occurred without Lambey. A quick comb of the house turned up nothing. I called Jo on his cell phone and his sheepish “he’s in my car” made me feel a little sick. Edie was going to have to try and go cold-turkey without her little friend. I tried substitutions (no Ruby!) I tried trickery (this is Lambey’s brother!). I actually made Grace cry by taking one of her stuffies and lending it to Edie (“but that is my most specialist stuffie ever!) I tried lying down with Edie, and my hair was literally soaked by her tears. I invited Grace in to the bed, to see if big sister might be a calming force. But Edie just kept popping up, and because she was wearing a sleeveless nightie, she looked like a little-girl version of Marlon Brando wearing a wife-beater, only instead of crying Stella! into the night, she was crying Lambey! instead.
Finally, after an hour had passed, and Grace wasn’t able to fall asleep with all the drama, and Edie showing no signs of calming down, I did the unthinkable. I called Jo home. Now, I have dealt with a lot on my own, colicy babies, high temperatures, projectile vomiting…you name it. Never did this somewhat seasoned mom think I would ever call my husband home for a stuffed animal. Funny thing is, Jo realized the importance of Lambey and came home without any questions asked. The house was quiet again within five minutes of him being home.

I am in awe of the power of Lambey.


.....ummm, any similar stories would be welcome to alleviate any fears I have that Edie isn't, y'know, a little obsessive compulsive or somethin'

Hey kids, want to feel better about your day?

Against my better judgement, I stayed up too late and watched the final episode of "The Kennedys". Against my better judgement, I read one too many chapters of BossyPants by Tina Fey (so funny). My lack of judgement made me go to bed wayyyy past my bedtime.

I awoke from a brutal nightmare (I couldn't find my minivan and there was a terrorist attack going down) at around 2 a.m. I got back to sleep eventually, only to be woken up by Edie who also had a brutal nightmare (giants yo). After a game of musical beds/pillows we settled in her bed and fell asleep. I was woken up by Grace around 4:30 who was suffering from nightmares too scary to even talk about (wasn't sure if I should call bullshit on that or not). Too tired to fight, I flopped into her bed, amazed at her strength and ability to wrestle all the blankets from her mother and I curled up the fetal position and sucked my thumb until I fell asleep.

When the cruel cruel alarm went of from my bedroom at 6:45, I was still in Grace's room and couldn't whack the snooze button so I HAD to get up to shut the damn thing off. Whoops. Something was amiss. Oh, one of my eyes was sealed shut, that's all Have I mentioned that I have brutal seasonal allergies? Well, this week they have manifested themselves into various eye pleasing ways, such as the golf ball sized hive on my forehead a couple of days ago (I don't have bangs, just sayin') and a crusty shut right eye this morning. But life must go on. I attempted to wake the girls who were very cranky from their disturbed slumber last night and I had to get them out the door by 8:00 for their camp outing today. While I was trying to get them up, the phone began ringing incessantly. When I finally picked up the phone (I have the ability to say WHAT! FUCK! with a simple chilly "Hello" in these instances) it was Jonas reminding me to empty the pool skimmer or elsebadthingswillhappenanditwillallbemyfault (he's been out of town this week).

Okay, so, with one eye shut and my robe falling open I went outside to empty the stupid damn skimmer. When I picked it up I let out a blood curdling scream because there was a dead frog floating in it. I am irrationally scared of 3 things in life 1) Zombies 2) Cannibalism (have you seen The Road?) and 3) Frogs. So, kindly picture a one eyed, robe flapping open crazy haired mama screaming and running around in her back yard, all while her little darlings are inside watching Phineas and Ferb, eating their Cheerios, oblivious to it all.

I won't even go into the epic fit Edie pitched when I attempted to get her moving towards the door, but it did involve her slamming Lambey to the floor (poor Lambey, NOT his fault) and a few solid rounds of "you don't love me". While this chaos was going done, Grace thought it would be a good time to ask me about Halloween and what she should dress up as, what hood in Toronto we were going to trick or treat in etc etc. Forgive me Grace for not engaging in this particular conversation at this particular moment in time.

And, not sure who I think I am, but I also put on white jeans just to tempt the Fates this morning.

Feel better about your morning? You're welcome.

And Now for Edie....

My little Edie Bikini, you are turning 5 tomorrow! I guess it’s time to stop treating you like my little baby (never!)

A few little things I want to keep in my Edie Archives forever:


I love how you tell me you love me before you go to bed, and you say love so many times that you run out of breath and heave a big sigh at the end, like you are completely spent.

I love the way you will exclaim that something is the most specialist thing to have ever been bestowed on to you, and then you offer to share it with whoever is in the room. It kills me, it is so sweet.

The way you look at me when you say you hate something, because you know I hate the word hate (hypocrite, I know) – that look shows me you will test the waters with me ten-fold in the future.

Okay, this actually drives me crazy, but I suspect it will be endearing one day. You are a messy child. The messiest little girl ever. You spill everything, you knock things down, your markers roll off the table constantly, your face is always covered in something, your always touching me with your grubby little hands, and you do all this with a tiara and princess dress on.

I love the way you call your stuffed dog Puppy Puppy Puff Puff, and you give him to me to sleep with because you feel badly that I don't have a stuffie. I love finding him on our bed.

I love that you call Lambey's fluffiest bits "The Soft".

I love that you don't walk, you hop, and I super-love that this past week even you noticed that you don't walk anywhere when you asked me if I noticed that you hop instead of walk.

I love how when you are sleeping, you look like you are hard at work, recharging your batteries.

What freaks me out is that I was such an insecure first-time Mom with Gracie, thinking that I was doing everything wrong, that I actually said out loud that I wouldn't have another child. Even when pregnant I was filled with doubt that I could do it all over again. My little girl, you've made it as easy as pie.

Love you to the stars Edie.