I wonder if Shakespeare has this kind of inspiration for his plays?
*Curtain*
The setting: Dinner on Sunday night, our dining room table.
Grace: MAMMAAA??? IS DADDY ALLOWED TO WATCH FOOTBALL DURING DINNER????
Edie: I wanna watch Max and Ruby!
Mother: No Edie. Hmmmm, ask Daddy what he thinks.
Grace: Daddy? Daaadddddyyyyy? DADDY!
Father: Hummm? What?
Grace: ARE YOU ALLOWED TO WATCH FOOTBALL DURING DINNER?
Mother: (hopeful look in my direction, my direction shoots daggers right back at him) errr, no. (turns off t.v.)
Mother: Edie, to the table please, it’s dinner time.
Edie; (playing with her dolls) I’m feeding my babies!
Mother: Well, it’s time for you to eat.
Edie: NO!
Mother: Edie, do I have to count to 3?
Edie: (scurries, hops, whatever that strange thing she does, to the table). I don’t like this! (pointing to a carrot)
Mother: It’s a carrot Edie, you eat them every day.
Edie: NO!
Grace: EDIE EAT YOUR DINNER OR ELSE NO DESERT RIGHT MOMMY!!???
Edie: (tears) I want desert!!!!
Mother: Then eat some dinner please.
Edie: (shoves hommos smeared carrot into her mouth, proceeds to put head on my lap, I get a good view of her snotty nose and chewed up carrot and hommus in her mouth).
Mother: Now let’s try some casserole Edie.
Edie: NO!
Grace: I LOVE IT MOMMY CAN I HAVE MORE?
Edie: No Gracie!
Grace: EDIE I DIDN’T DO ANYTHING EAT YOUR DINNER!
Edie: No! (shoots plate across dinner table at Gracie)
Grace: (some guttural noise I can’t type)
Edie manages to eat a little, and when desert came along (a yogurt tube), she (accidentally) squirted it all over the floor and then (quite purposefully) smeared it all over the floor with her foot. Mother reaches for the bottle of scotch
And scene.
What’s Sunday dinner like at your house???
4 comments:
OMG I laughed myself silly reading this. Made me think my dinners with the two kids here. 3 and 1 you can just think about how it goes.
Sounds about right to be dinner at our place, except you left out the "This is TOO HOT. I can't eat this".....minutes go by......"This is TOO COLD. You need to heat it up in the microwave." It's like living with 2 Goldilockses (Goldylocksii?). Oh, and I have merlot rather than scotch. But otherwise, the. same. freakin'. story.
My father reaches for the Scotch at the best of times. You're doing fine...
My house was pretty quiet, but I'm sure we had our moments.
I want to wish you and your family a very Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year. :)
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